Monday, the start of the new week.

I head to work as usual and dive into my tasks as always.

And.

Manager Monou is working just like normal too.

The usual scene in Sales Division 3.

“Manager Monou… here’s the data summary you asked for.”

“Thank you. What about the other one—the YouTuber promotion request? I believe I asked you to compile the relationship between views and actual sales.”

“Ah. That one’s not done yet…”

“Can you finish it by this morning? I’ll be out in the afternoon.”

“Understood. I’ll do it right away.”

The same exchange as always.

Manager Monou maintains the decisive attitude worthy of being called the “Empress.”

But.

Somehow… her responses feel a little colder than usual.

It could very well be my persecution complex.

“Um, Manager Monou…”

“What?”

She directs a cold gaze at me.

It wasn’t anger—it was a look that pushed me away coldly.

“…N-never mind.”

I couldn’t say anything and timidly returned to my seat.

Last week, Friday night──

On the way back from drinking with Kanomata, I happened to run into Manager Monou.

Of all moments, it was exactly when Kanomata and I had our arms linked.

After a moment of silence where the air seemed to freeze,

“Manager Monou… ah. Um, this is…”

Kanomata spoke up and hurriedly put distance between us.

“It’s not anything deep like that… We just happened to drink alone today, and things got a little exciting, that’s all…”

She explained in a panicked tone.

From Kanomata’s perspective, she was just making excuses to a workplace superior.

We’re not dating or anything.

But from Manager Monou’s viewpoint, how did we look?

“…I see.”

Manager Monou nodded quietly──and smiled.

A small, but definite smile.

Yet it made my soul feel ice-cold.

“I didn’t know. That you two were in such a deep relationship.”

“N-no, that’s not it!”

“It’s fine to get carried away and let loose, but in moderation.”

With that brief farewell, she turned on her heel and walked toward the station.

“Ah…”

I tried to call out somehow, but no words came.

I had no idea what to say in that situation.

“Aww~… We might have been misunderstood.”

“………”

“Sanzawa-kun?”

“…Ah, yeah. What should I do…”

Faced with such terribly bad timing, I could only feel lost.

That was Friday’s incident.

Over the weekend, I sent Manager Monou messages many times.

I just wanted to clear up the misunderstanding at least.

Because.

Just looking at that situation, it would seem like I──turned down Manager Monou’s invitation to prioritize a date with Kanomata.

In fact… that’s exactly how it looked.

From Manager Monou’s perspective, it probably seemed like I lied about “drinking with coworkers” to reject the pairing and went drinking alone with Kanomata.

That’s why I desperately explained the circumstances.

I properly explained everything, including Kutsuwa’s scheming, to clear the misunderstanding.

But.

Over the weekend──there was no reply from Manager Monou at all.

“…Manager Monou.”

I stand up, take the printed documents, and head to her again.

“I finished summarizing the other data too.”

Please check it.

I hand over the documents.

“…!”

Manager Monou frowns for a moment.

Staring at the sticky note attached to the documents.

“Today during lunch break

Please give me time to talk properly

I’ll be waiting in the warehouse”

A secret message on the sticky note attached to the documents.

An old-fashioned method I’ve only seen in dramas.

When Manager Monou did the same thing before, I couldn’t help pointing out “Wouldn’t a smartphone be fine?”──but now that my messages are being ignored, I have no choice but to rely on this analog method.

A message sent desperately, clutching at straws.

Manager Monou looks at the sticky note, then shifts her gaze to me, and

“…Understood.”

quietly says.

Lunch break.

While most employees are having lunch, I hurry to the warehouse.

Fortunately, or as expected.

Since it’s a place people rarely come to, there was no one inside.

A few minutes later──Manager Monou enters too.

“So, Sanzawa-kun, what did you want to talk about?”

She says flatly, expressionless.

She’s not usually very expressive, but today her face seems a bit sterner than normal.

“I-I absolutely… wanted to clear up the misunderstanding at least.”

In the heavy atmosphere, I somehow start.

“As I sent in the messages… ending up drinking alone with Kanomata was truly a coincidence… When I turned down Manager Monou’s invitation, it absolutely wasn’t because I had plans to drink alone with Kanomata… So I didn’t lie…”

I want her to understand.

I don’t want to be misunderstood.

With that single-minded desperation, I continue explaining──

“Of course… I think I’m at fault too. For doing something that caused a misunderstanding, I’m truly sorry──”

“──Don’t apologize.”

Manager Monou says.

In a low, sharp voice, cutting me off.

“Eh…”

“In the messages you sent too. Apologizing politely over and over… Sanzawa-kun, what exactly are you apologizing for?”

“That’s…”

“Why apologize when you haven’t done anything wrong?”

“………”

“Could it be──you think I’m angry?”

She says with a straight face, a stern face.

More than angry, a face that looks frustrated.

“I’m not angry. There’s no need to be angry. Whatever you do after turning down my invitation has nothing to do with me.”

“………”

“Even if you’re dating someone, there’s no need to apologize to me, right?”

“B-but that’s a misunderstanding…”

“It doesn’t matter, whether it’s a misunderstanding or the truth. No matter the reason you turn down the pairing, I have no intention of blaming you. You don’t need to explain every little reason. I have no intention of interfering more than necessary either.”

“………”

“So… yes. If anything, I might be a little angry that you think ‘I’m angry’.”

She says in a slightly irritated voice, with a sarcastic tone.

Ah, that’s right.

Manager Monou is correct.

What was I apologizing for?

I didn’t want to be misunderstood… but in the end, that’s just for my own convenience.

I was only apologizing for self-preservation and self-justification.

Or perhaps──I was being conceited.

Thinking that drinking alone with Kanomata made Manager Monou uncomfortable.

Pure overconfidence.

There’s no way she’d feel uncomfortable.

She and I are just physical.

Manager Monou wants nothing more from me than my body.

“…It’s fine even if you date Kanomata-san.”

To me, lost for words, Manager Monou says.

In a somewhat distant tone.

“Eh…”

“Isn’t she good? Young and cute, seems nice personality-wise too. I think you two suit each other.”

“W-wait. What are you saying…”

“You don’t need to hold back for me. If you want to stop the pairing, say it anytime. I have no intention of binding your romance or future because of me──”

“Please listen!”

I unintentionally raise my voice and grab both her shoulders.

Manager Monou looks startled.

Still, strength goes into my hands.

“Hey… Sanzawa-kun…”

“…I have no intention of dating Kanomata. I don’t want to end things with Manager Monou either. Because… because I──”

Emotions rising, I almost blurt out the truth I must never say.

But the next moment──

From beyond the warehouse door, voices are heard.

“…Jeez, give me a break. Chores even during lunch break.”

“Seriously. Make the part-timers do this.”

Two male voices.

They’re right near the door.

“──H-hide!”

Manager Monou whispers urgently while pushing me deeper into the warehouse.

We somehow squeeze into the gap between steel shelves.

The warehouse is overflowing with stuff. The back probably isn’t visible from the entrance. Though if they come close, we’re done.

Click, the door opens, and two male employees enter.

From voices alone, i’t’s unclear, but probably someone from sales.

“…Sanzawa-kun, closer this way…!”

In the gap between shelves.

In a very close position, Manager Monou whispers.

“B-but any closer…”

“Just do it! What if we’re found?”

“…Yes.”

Obeying the order, I press our bodies even closer.

Whoa, bad. This is pretty… bad.

Our fronts completely pressed together, naturally in an embracing position.

Her huge breasts, even through the suit, squish and change shape against my chest.

Our legs touch too, creating a strange ticklish feeling.

“…Nn.”

Breathing distance where I can feel her breath. A nice scent drifts from her glossy hair, and I don’t know what to do.

My body is hot.

From the arms holding her──her body heat transmits.

Probably about five minutes.

The two male employees finish their task and leave the warehouse.

Once the door closes, we immediately jump out of the gap and put distance between us.

“Haa, haa… That was close.”

Manager Monou, breathing heavily, says while fixing her clothes.

“…Um.”

I timidly open my mouth.

“It’s late to say, but… we didn’t really need to hide, right?”

“…Eh?”

“Even if we were talking about something we can’t let others hear… me and Manager Monou being alone in the warehouse isn’t that unnatural.”

I mean, we’ve come here alone quite a few times before.

I was overwhelmed by Manager Monou’s intensity and hid in panic, but thinking calmly, there was no need to hide at all.

“…~~!”

After a brief pause, Manager Monou’s face turns bright red.

“I-it’s fine! Better safe than sorry!”

She quickly says as if to gloss over, then

“Anyway──conversation over.”

As if flipping a switch, she continues in a strong tone.

“I’m not angry, so no need to apologize. If you plan to date Kanomata-san, we end our relationship immediately. If not, we maintain the status quo. That’s fine, right? If you have opinions, report them all later.”

After saying it one-sidedly, Manager Monou quickly leaves the warehouse.

Left behind, I can only stand there dumbfounded.

I don’t know what to do or what to say.

Frustratingly, in my clenched fist──only the body heat from earlier remains

In the afternoon, I go out alone, visiting bookstores and clients.

Around past five in the evening, I head straight home without returning to the company.

Taking a taxi to my apartment.

On the way──throb, my head hurts, and I press my forehead.

“Customer, you okay?”

“…I’m fine.”

I say that, but… my condition isn’t good.

Headache, my whole body was also heavy.

Joints aching too.

From 32 years of experience, I kinda know.

Probably──I have a fever.

I somehow hid it at the company──but my head hurt a bit since morning when I woke up. Thought it was just a headache, took painkillers and went to work… but as time passed, my condition worsened.

Honestly… my head isn’t working well, no room for thought.

That’s why.

I treated Sanzawa-kun harshly too.

“………”

Ah, why did I say those things.

I wanted to brush it off casually.

I wanted to properly reply to the weekend messages.

Yet──I didn’t know what to do.

Friday.

The moment I saw the two looking close──my mind went blank.

I was shocked more than I expected.

Seeing the two with flushed faces from drinking, playfully close──I thought they suited each other.

A normal couple around the same age.

I don’t even know what the dark emotion sprouting in my chest is.

Just an overwhelming impatience overflowed.

Why.

Sanzawa-kun and I are only together for making a baby.

If he gets a girlfriend or someone he likes, I planned to step back immediately.

I don’t want to interfere with his life.

I don’t want to be an extra burden.

I’m already troubling him with an unethical request.

Yet──seeing him with another woman, I was far more shaken than I thought.

Of course, I don’t think Sanzawa-kun lied.

That the drinking becoming just the two was coincidence, that he has no intention of dating Kanomata-san right now, I believe all that. I trust him there.

So in the end, it’s just my heart’s problem.

I’m the one arbitrarily imagining and fantasizing, getting irritated alone.

…Idiotic.

What are you thinking, Monou Yuiko.

He──is not my boyfriend or anything.

Just a physical relationship.

He’s only with me because I’m a convenient woman to sleep with.

Once I get pregnant, the relationship ends──and if he gets a proper partner, he doesn’t need to deal with me.

I knew that all along.

Yet why does my chest hurt so much──

“…!”

My head hurts again. Fever seems higher too. No good. My head isn’t working at all. I want to lie in bed right now.

The taxi stops.

Somehow I pay electronically and walk to the apartment. Feels like walking on clouds. I somehow walk forward.

Ah… what to do.

Fridge might be empty. I at least need sports drink… but I can’t shop now. Contact Kae… no, feels bad to call for just a cold. She said instructor work has night shifts too.

Ah──

That’s why I hate catching colds.

The loneliness and emptiness of living alone hits all at once.

Crushed by negative emotions──almost regretting past decisions.

I think.

My feverish head thinks.

If only.

If only I hadn’t divorced my ex-husband then.

Maybe I’d have a family now. If bedridden with a cold, someone might help.

And.

Mom wouldn’t have──

“………”

I desperately shake off the regret floating in my hazy consciousness.

Don’t be spoiled.

I made the decision myself.

I don’t need anyone’s help. I’ll never marry or love again. I’ll have a child and live with them. That’s fine. That’s all.

Trying to steel myself… but my body remains heavy.

Just a bit more to the apartment entrance.

The moment I think that and relax──my knees buckle.

Strength won’t enter my body properly.

Collapsing on the spot──

“──Manager Monou!”

And.

A familiar voice reaches my ears.

My falling body──is firmly caught.

I know.

I know this feeling.

He looks slender, but his arms and chest have solid muscle.

I’ve been held by this strong body──many times.

“Sanzawa… kun…”

The one who helped was Sanzawa-kun.

The moment I realize he’s supporting me──before surprise, I notice myself feeling relieved.